Arizona Humor

rizona Humor Old West Diner

The old prospector gave up the search and became a diner operator. His place was widely known for its tamales and hamburgers.

Then, suddenly, they didn't taste quite the same. Finally, someone complained to the State Health Department, but an inspector could find nothing wrong.

"What kind of meat do you use?" the inspector asked.

"Oh, I use rabbit - jack rabbit," the prospector answered.

"I've eaten rabbit," the inspector said. "Are you sure you use only rabbit?"

"Well, no. I had a good string of burros when I was prospecting, and I don't need them anymore, so I've been mixing a little burro meat with the rabbit."

"How much burro?" the inspector asked. "What proportion?"

"I mix it one to one."

"You mean a pound of burro meat to a pound of rabbit?"

"Oh, no," said the prospector, "I mix it one rabbit to one burro."

Cultural Encounter

While attending graduate school at Northern Arizona University, my husband, our six-year-old son, and I were invited to spend a weekend with friends at Many Farms on the Navajo Indian Reservation.

A Navajo man who had been attending the summer session at NAU rode with us.

As we drove across the reser-vation, our son became more and more excited. Finally, he said, "Oh, I hope I get to see some wild Indians."

The Navajo, who was sitting in the front seat, turned around and without expression commented, "You can come over to my house and see my kids."

Grand Canyon Hike

While I was working at the Grand Canyon National Park, I often trekked short distances down Bright Angel Trail.

I observed the reactions of many visitors, but my favorite comment came from a girl about eight years old just finishing her hike.

As we met on the trail, she looked me straight in the eye and said, "You're going to regret this."

Hunter's Quandary

Every fall the persons who answer the Arizona Game and Fish Department's telephones gird themselves for the onslaught of questions from bewildered winter visitors.

But one query, regarding the bag limits for mourning doves during the hunting season, really threw them.

"If the limit for mourning doves is 10 a day," one caller asked, "how much is the limit for afternoon birds?"

Traffic Signals

I was trying to follow the car of my sister-in-law, Clara, when I lost sight of it in the swarming Phoenix traffic.

I was several cars back at what seemed to be an unending red light when I noticed the man in the car ahead signalling me.

I rolled down my window and heard him shout, "Clara says to take a left at the light. Pass it on."

Before Road Maps

Many years ago, we became hopelessly lost while driving the dirt roads on the extremely remote Arizona Strip northwest of the Grand Canyon.

Finally my Dad stopped the car when he saw a bearded old prospector plodding along on an ancient horse and leading a heavily laden burro. Dad pointed to a narrow rutted road hardly more than a trail and asked, "Can we take this road to Fredonia?"

The old man looked us over, spat, and prodded his mount into motion again. "Don't give a durn what road you take," he said.

Heady Company

When I worked at a Willcox nursing home, one of the residents who was very much in her right mind used to walk down the hall conversing with herself.

One day I asked her, "Why do you talk to yourself so much?"

She replied, "That's the only way I can carry on an intelligent conversation around here."

Quiet Zone

My wife and I and our three children were making our first trip to the public library after arriving in Tucson in 1959.

As we approached the library, our oldest child - "the responsible one" - forewarned her two younger siblings, "Shhh, you're not supposed to talk in here. You might make somebody skip a page."

Keep In Touch

I asked my friends, Susan and Ernie, how often they kept in touch with their son who was away at college.

"Oh, on a very regular basis," Susan said.

"We last heard from him on the 20th," Ernie noted.

"How can you be so sure of the date?" Susan asked.

Ernie replied, "I looked it up in the checkbook this morning."

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