BY: Jim Willoughby,Audra Dowless,Frank E. Reetz,Gail Dudley,Cathy Barnhardt,H.J. Duffy

humor: What a Guy

A fellow approached a dentist friend of ours and inquired about the price of a root canal. Our friend replied that it would cost about $2,500.

"That's outrageous," the man said. "Couldn't you do it any cheaper?"

The dentist replied, "If I use less anesthesia, it would be more painful, but the cost would drop to about $2,000."

"That's still way too much,"complained the man. "Isn't there a cheaper way?"

"Well, I could use no anesthesia at all. It would be very, very painful, of course, but it could be done that way for around $1,500."

"That's more like it," the man exclaimed. "I'll send my wife around in the morning."

Good Deal

While visiting in Sierra Vista, we overheard an eager-beaver salesman trying to encourage a storekeeper to carry his product. When all else failed, he tried to bribe the merchant with a bottle of wine.

"My conscience wouldn't allow me to accept a gift," the storekeeper protested.

"Well, what if I sold it to you for a dime?" the salesman persisted.

"In that case, I'll take two," replied the merchant.

Toothless

My little sister, Rachel, and I visited our grandparents in Phoenix. As I helped Grandma fix supper one evening, she told Rachel to tell Grandpa it was time to eat. Rachel found Grandpa in the bathroomflossing his teeth, and he said he'd be out in a minute. Rachel came back into the kitchen and announced to Grandma, "Grandpa will be here as soon as he's done tying in his teeth."

Fishermen talk about the fish that got away, and cowboys talk about the cows that didn't Logical Stretch

The summer before my daughter, Bethany, started school, her older brother and I took her camping along the East Verde River. We usually used a tent trailer, but as it was just the three of us, we set up our dome tent instead. We had a great time. After Bethany started school, she learned how the Plains Indians also lived in tents, called tepees. She brought home a beautiful drawing of several tepees -all with tiny lines down the front of them. We asked her what those lines were. "Oh," she replied, "those are the zippers."

Two old cowboys sat drinking coffee together on a sunny porch, discussing various items of trivia. From across the yard, a speckled blue cow dog trotted up, stretched, and sprawled in the green grass, ready for his morning nap."What's that blue dog's name?" asked the visiting cowboy.

The other man, quite a bit older, rubbed his bald head thoughtfully. "You're gonna have to help me a little with this... what's that pretty red flower with all the soft petals and the thorns on the stem?" he asked, pointing to a nearby bush.

"Why them's roses," the visitor replied.

"Oh, that's it, that's it," the older man said. Turning toward the house he shouted, "Rosie! What the devil is the blue dog's name?"

Life in the Fast Lane

The owner of a general store in a small Arizona town where I lived was known for his brevity. One day a large Winnebago pulled up to the gas pump outside the store. The RV was towing a small car and carrying four bicycles, a trail bike, two self-propelled water skis, and a powerboat. Looking up at the driver, the proprietor said, "Don't plan on doin' much walkin', do ya?"

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