ARIZONA HUMOR

humor: Cowboys are weather-wise; city folks are otherwise Happy Ending

Arizona ranch owner was always complaining that his boots were too tight. One of his friends finally suggested that he have them stretched. "Nothin' doin'," he replied. "These boots are too tight, and that's the way they're gonna stay. Every mornin', I get up and gotta round up all the cattle that busted out durin' the night, mend the fences they tore down and watch my ranch blowin' away in the dust. In the evenin', I gotta listen to my wife nag me about movin' to the city. "Pullin' these tight boots off my feet before bedtime is the only pleasure I get all day."

One Perception

My 6-year-old grandson and his family joined us recently in our Scottsdale home along with relatives visiting from Spokane, Washington. Together we enjoyed a game of Pictionary. My niece passed the easiest words to my grandson, and most of his drawings were quite accurate. But we puzzled over his picture of an "icicle." Realizing he'd spent his entire life in the Southwest, I said, "Oh, I guess you've never seen an icicle, have you?" "Yes, I have," he replied with conviction. "I bought one in the school lunchroom once."

Tropical Wonders

My younger brother, Ryan, had never been out of Iowa in all his 19 years until he flew to Phoenix last May. He was excited when he got off the plane and couldn't wait to see the mountains and palm trees. As I was driving him to my house, Ryan asked me to pull over so he could take a picture of some palm trees, so I did. He got out and adjusted his camera lens. But just as I thought he was going to snap the picture, he pulled his camera away and looked rather puzzled. "What's wrong?" I asked. "Where are all the coconuts?"

Big Problem

Several years ago on a clear, quiet winter night, the Casa Grande Police Department received a call about a suspicious light hanging low in the northeast sky. The duty sergeant, although skeptical at first, started watching it and became concerned. He radioed the dispatcher and directed him to call an astronomy professor from Central Arizona College and ask what the light might be. The dispatcher radioed back shortly and informed the sergeant that what he was looking at was "cirrus." Agitated at this news, the sergeant replied, "I know it's serious. It's right over the college!"

Motel Woes

In the early '60s, my parents owned and operated a year-round motel in Casa Grande. In the summer, when the temperature rose to 118 degrees, travelers reached our little town and began searching for a place to stay. Many staggered into my parents' motel and asked the usual questions: Do you have a swimming pool? Is that a color TV? Is that your ice machine? On one such occasion, my mother escorted a rather proper woman to see a room and returned, chuckling. "I thought I'd heard it all," she said, and told us what happened. As the woman surveyed the room, a fly flew in through the open door. The woman watched the fly for a few seconds, then turned to my mother and asked, "Is that your fly?"

The Old Fallback

Our youngest son, a native Arizonan, takes some good-natured ribbing about Arizona's summer heat from his Air Force buddies. Once, when his answer included the "egg frying on the sidewalk" story, a fellow sergeant said, "That old saw isn't funny anymore." To which our son responded, "It's a dry humor."

ARIZONA HIGHWAYS BOOKS ARIZONA HIGHWAYS BOOKS THE LEGACY OF SEDONA...THROUGH A CHILD'S EYES

THE FIRST CHILDREN'S BOOK ABOUT SEDONA SCHNEBLY, written by descendant Lisa Schnebly Heidinger, The Three Sedonas describes how she trekked from Missouri to the primitive yet "magical" red rock country that became Sedona, Arizona. The story is told from the perspective of her great-greatgranddaughter, 6-year-old Sedona. The young girl shares family stories as she describes her frontier relative's pioneering spirit in a land of breathtaking beauty. Children and parents alike will want to read this story again and again, not just for the historical details but also for the feelings it evokes and the reminder that they, too, are part of history.

THE THREE SEDONAS

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